Why are some children and adults more susceptible to bullying?
How can we develop a protective shield against bullying?
No matter what form abuse or bullying takes it creates pain. Depending on the emotional memory of early childhood and youth we feel and resolve pain to varying degrees and effectiveness. This emotional memory is what gives us our resiliency and comes from how we perceive our experiences; how we emotionally feel about our experiences in early childhood and youth. I often call this emotional memory our underlying supportive skills. If in early childhood and youth we perceive our experiences as emotionally supportive, if we are shown, taught and observe patience, self-esteem, optimism, emotional control and self-regulation, we absorb and reflect a calmness, a peace that over time becomes our steady and reactive state. In the future with these underlying supportive skills and a calm reactive state, if bullied we are less prone to emotional overreaction stemming from insecurity and low self-esteem. When children are in an emotionally supportive environment they develop the underlying supportive skills that allow for success and happiness in the future. Do you as a parent fully understand how to develop these underlying supportive skills in your children and provide them with a positive emotional memory? These skills are learned. Parents can learn how to improve these skills in their children. When children experience patience, optimism, self-esteem, emotional control and self-regulation in their environments they learn and absorb these skills and they will be less susceptible to bullies. If bullied they will respond in an appropriate and effective way. When children are not given these underlying supportive skills they will vulnerable to the bully’s abuse with possible severe long term consequences.